I'm lost.


In another life, Id make you stay.. So I don't have to say you were the one that got away.


Tuesday, July 3rd 2012
Oh hey, Hi. Today? well obviously something happened the reason why I am here. So I was wondering, Have you ever wanted to change your fate? Like the things thats happening now, Is this what you wanted? Regretted any decisions you made? I know I did. I dont get myself, Wenwei has been very rude, Though we talk and we're friends but.. I dont know. I still.. I dont know, I'd hate him for a split second and then here I am again. Trying to get over him, especially in school. I always remind my myself, Its only a crush so I wont get high hopes when we happen to 'clash' or 'meet', I'd think its my coincidence huh? I cant help myself, Everytime I look at him or he happens to look at me, My heart just skips a beat. Or when I'm near him, I have this.. feeling. Indescribable feelings. Hais zahidah, you're total bullshit. Anyways back to when I was in school. The usuals, I was late Dad had to send me to school by car, He drove in. And yknow what? Wenwei happened to just dash across the road, and I can see my dad wanting to horn him. And he went like ' Alamak, this boy ' and I was like ' dont honk lah ' lololol. Assembly blablabla. Recess blahblahblah, Well basically It happened after school. He sat near our table doing his history work, Amirah went there. And Idk Just talk to him? Was giving chocolates to everyone, I felt really happy. That good feeling, yeah. Hahahaa, So amirah borrowed him a pen and she went off, I was left there alone.... He finished and he got off his seat and was like "Amirah amirah" Looking around searching for her, But fail. He saw me, and he just looked at me. I got up my sit, came to him closer, and just held the pen he gave back, and we gazed into each others eyes. Well not that long, 2 minutes I suppose? Thats cause he had to give it to me right? Yeah, My face was superbly cool and all. And once i returned to my seat and the rest came in, I freaked out. great........ So they went off to Idk where.... But me and wenwei before he left, He looked at me again, and I just happen to turn and I quickly looked away..... So I went off a few minutes later with atheerah and fatimah heading to the bus stop when suddenly wild wenwei appeared! HAHA. He saw us, and fatimah was like "act cool zahidah" me: " shhh im acting cool" yeah he took his moms car. After ngaji I decided to text him? Since he had whatsapp? I made that as an excuse. 


Me: O.O you got whatsapp?
Him: who you
Me: (._.) zahidah?
Him: .....yea
Me: Ohh cool. How's you? ^^
Him: Fine
Me: (Y) Studies?
Him: Good
Me: its been a few years, and its still awkward for you to talk to me huh? (._.)
Him: Stop giving me the act cute face when in school.. I just find it annoying, other than that I'm okay.
Me: O.o okay......... sorry......


Eh wait WHATTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT. I never act cute infront of him before, kanasai. The most also I always do a pokerface when hes there Im just like (._.) Hais. Or is he indirectly telling me that Im cute(;  But seriously................................................. Hais. See eventhough he like sort of hurt me with his straightforwardness. I..... dont care. Hais. I'm lost. I dont know which way to go.


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