confused.

20th November, 2015
I don't know what's wrong with me after his departure from SG. I honestly don't know.. So today he told me he's going on a date after five days in Doha. That's fast. I guess I accidentally freaked. I didn't expect my reaction either. I know I wanna be there for him but to listen to his stories afterwards.. Mm. I don't know what to feel. Everything's all jumbled up, and he's the only person I can talk to about this but at the same time I don't. & do you know how annoying it is that he could just go with the flow? And seem so cool about it? That's where I know how much I'm worth it. And honestly speaking, I love how he bs when he says he loves me. I guess half of my heart wants to hear it too.
I guess asking him to take the challenge to stop talking to me for a week would work out for me. I'd figure out what's all this about, but I'm sure I don't want to lose him. He's the first person I wanna talk to whenever something bitchy or idiotic happens. I don't know if he'll be there for me but weirdly, I wanna be there for him. And that's what I'm sure about. I don't want to lose him because the first time I lost someone dearly to me it hurts.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

What is this tragedy?

Image
Why? Why am i giving up slowly? giving up slowly on our relationship? why whenever school happen to reopen and i see your face everytime, I start remembering of us. What we used to be. And when I caught you staring or just happen to look, my heart skips a beat or when you're near. I'd get excited. Why?  Wednesday, June 27th 2012 I'm finally back, after a few months I was away. I was so busy with life till I didnt had the time to blog anymore, this blog had memories. School reopened last two days ago, 1 month of holiday seemed superbly short. & Once I'm back in school, here we go again. Seriously, I really want to know this feeling I have for wenwei. Is it love? Or just a crush? And for Michele too. He makes me really happy but.. when I am with him. The feeling isnt the same for when I am with wenwei though we don't talk anymore. I had a dream yesterday, A wonderful dream. A dream that he'd come back, and that he regretted and promised to chang
Read more

I wish i was cinderella):

Image
cant believe he's so hawt. That time, now so old. Chad Michael Murray, omgg. Melt i tell you, ahhahaha. Just finish watching A cinderella story. omg, i cried. hahaha, yes. I've watched it before, watched it again and yeahh. U know whut, I was imagining Hilary duff was me and u-know-who is him. HAHAHAHAHA. k, so prasaan. I wanna be cinderella, that bitchh has everything): I know right. But, atleast im dreaming d: HAHAHAHA. k zahidah, shut up. You know whut? Im planning to do something when school re-open. For him, i guess. I dont know if its worth my time. But yeahh, hahaha. Heard from other people he moved on. Thats fast. :/ How about tomorrow? does he remembers? nahh, wadddddddd am i thinking. Guys :/ haishhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, bluek. I've been online since just now. My stomach hurts so badly, when i cough or sneeze. Grr, damn. omg, i need a text buddy so badddddddddddddddd. kbye.
Read more

kembangan.

Image
tuesday, 11/01/10 why do you have to change ? :/ Hihi. so err, yah. today's school? was umm, some sort of okay. i guess, yesterday was really fvcking depressing. gosh, you do not want to know wad happened. i guess, now. me and him are friends? well, not really. Still strangers though, in reality. this sucks, i mean. i've been giving myself high hopes and nothing ever comes true. im trying my best to do something but he just.. i dont know, doesnt give a fuck? anyways. oh, after school today ate at kembang, we walked around. it was fun, till some dog barked at us, and some cat stared. lolll, walked past his house, so big. hee, Jalan Selamat the house number 40. i remembered^^. we walked, we gossiped, we dream big. and we sat near his house, a nearby bench. and a cat suddenly appeared from the drained. amirah la, she scream then the cat frightened run away. idiot. hahahaha. we were wasting our time there causeee well, we were waiting for shaziq, to come back from thee you know mu
Read more