Its nice to have someone who actually cares.

Im so frustrated with everything. My friends, School, Studies, Love shit. Whatever for once, Just for once. I just someone to be there for me, someone who really actually cares. I mean, My friends are all busy with their own lifes. I dont wanna disturb anyone, but whenever I tell them stuff. I mean they listen for the sake of listening. I'd prefer bottling up all my problems or whatever Im feeling and just stay like that, smiling like I dont have feelings. But whenever, I try. Its either they would have no response to it, or all they do is like "K zahidah K" even amirah sometimes, I mean I totally understand she wants me to forget but its easy for her to say when she has someone else on her mind. The reason why i still keep pictures because I miss that feeling, of being cared of. If i were to talk it out with my uhm, yeah friends. They would just pretend to 'care' I guess.

Wednesday, 14 September 2011

Uhm, today was kinda of a bad day in the end. But whatever. I woke up texted mei ying, met her at MRT and Jia hwee straight to Bedok McDonalds. Saw Zakiyah & Ridha, then headed for school. Bus was superb crowded as always. Reached school, sat down. He was there and oh! Amal too, I guess I got a little crush on him. Sat there talktalk laughlaugh, bestfriend came. Assembly went to homeroom, he walked the other way to the hall, I did too. Thinking it was at the hall. Jiahwee was gone with Meiying, I was left with zakiyah. Turned back, damnit it was him. Zakiyah was joking around with me, he tried to catch up cause we were walking really slow. But Kinda normal paced & amirah suddenly popped out and was standing beside me. Beside her? Him. trying to cut in. I nudged her shoulder, and almost hit him. lol-ed. I was excited cause Amal was there, luckily no one behind saw me acting like that. I think he did though, since he was turning to talk to Amal. lololol. Turned back, I saw salman. Shit. Slacked during assembly then test, Ict down to the library. I like this part, while going down. My eyes were ichy and he was right infront of me, Clash uh actually since he was from the 4th level. When going down, he turned back, saw me & quickly turned away. I saw lerwei, started talking to him and was like 'smile somemore uh smile, steepp only', and He smiled. infront of him, was him and amal! They were both walking superb slow lah, so yeah. Wenwei was near the railing already, i want to squeeze since so slow, then I accidentally bumped into amal. And he was like, " ehh" Me : "sorry ah!" then he smilesmile. zomg. ICT, madam wanis scolding us, she keep on talking about her class. wth. well, maybe a few times. So yeah, recess was loved! seriously, So sat a few rows away from his table, I went to buy drink first. Shaziq was beside me, whoa. Walked away, then he came and canteen was crowded like shit, so yeah he bought his food and then he sat, walao! Direct view, Its like me and him dating but from a few metres away, then I think he like go hidehide abit. So cant really see. =.= I was eating and smiling, then. He was eating, everytime he was munching his food his eyes become damn small like he's smiling. hahahaha. so cute, then someone go block him. Then he like, yknow stand up to see abit. but I dont know uh who the hell he was looking at, I prasaan. Got eye-contact baby. Went DNT, then blahblahblah. haish, science didnt get to see him. Wonder where he has gone too. grr. After science lesson, Waited for Meiying for awhile. Then me and Meiying, ditched the rest to see him and his gang to the canteen, ahhaha. He saw us! & then looked away, It was a one time glanced though. Blahblahblah, omg go bus stop. Bestfriend, damn this shit. He saw me, then he too looked away, bus came and then yeah, he turned from were he was sitting. Well for awhile, cause I caught him. hehehe. Cause i was starring. Duh. Then Jarett pedo, make the face. I accidentally hold akram's hand thinking it was Ifaaf's. err ew? So yeah, we stopped at bedok inter. Bestfriend was buying something or what at the mama shop, I was as always. Staring and looking at him, Then he turned and im like o.o quickly look away. hahaha, paiseyh. woo! ~ well atleast he turned, he turned and actually looked at me. awww. After makan and shit, had class and stuff. My mood suddenly changed, and I somehow started tearing. urgh, when anger turns into tears.